My father died just before Thanksgiving 2017 although I had actually lost him 11 years earlier.  When daddy remarried after my mother died, it seemed he thought he had to choose between his old family and his new one.  Maybe it was hard to be reminded of mamma.  I don’t know.  I know he was happy those last 11 years (except maybe the last few months when he became so ill).  I don’t begrudge my father the good years with his new family and am not resentful of it.  I know I had him for many, many years before that and nothing can take away the precious time we had or the wonderful memories we shared.  We were very close at one time.  I was “little peanut” and followed him every where I could.  I wanted to be just like him.  He was so supportive and encouraging.  Patience is an understatement.  He always treated me like a person–not like a child to be humored, ignored, or patronized.  He took seriously anything I said and never criticized or belittled.  Because of my safe relationship with my father I grew up to be immune to intimidation.  I look people straight in the eye and never once feel that I am less than they–even if they are in a position of authority or influence.  I once had a dean of my college (The University of Georgia) tell me, “you must have had a good relationship with your father”.  When I asked why he would say this he replied, “because you are not the least bit intimidated by meeting with me”.  I wondered, “am I supposed to be”?  I am very thankful for the time I had with my daddy before he got a new family.  I am happy he was happy and I am sorry he is gone.  I do know I will see him again one day.  I know, in my heart, he is in heaven.  He was not “churchy” and he did not spout scripture. I just remember the things he shared with me in my childhood and know that he was a true believer and because of that we will be reunited again for all eternity.  This time on earth is not all and his death is not the end–it’s only the beginning for him.  (written 12/3/17 for webbwisdom)


Leave a Reply