“Within a couple of weeks, I’d be as good as new on the outside, but my insides were damaged goods for life.”  Ashley Farley, Saving Ben  Sure, we are affected by things that happen to us forever, however, we don’t have to be “damaged for life”.  We, of course, may be “changed for life” but we, as survivors, are resilient and capable in spite of what has happened to us.  Terrible circumstances and events do change us in ways that can not be reversed however that does not mean we cannot recover, heal, adapt, or grow.  Only we can decide whether the harm evolves into strength or weakness.  We do have a choice of how we respond and whether we etch out a meaningful kernel, or allow ourselves to be stunted in some way.  History abounds with people who have survived horrors and did not allow themselves to be defined by that horror.  We do not have to let other people and circumstances control the rest of our lives.  Instead thinking of ourselves as “broken” or “damaged beyond repair” we can think of ourselves as becoming wiser, stronger, and more compassionate.  Sometimes we do go through things that forever alter us in some ways.  On the other hand, we are not defined by our worse moments–unless we agree to the definition.  If we agree, then it may very well become a self-fulfilling prophecy.  We always have a choice in how we chose to see ourselves and our circumstances.
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