DON’T FEEL BAD FOR LOVING


Have you ever been ashamed to tell people you still like (or love) someone you have every reason to hate?  Do you find yourself thinking kindly of someone from the past who hurt you terribly?  Is it possible to still love after betrayal, heartbreak, and even abuse?  Of course it’s possible.  When you love someone, really love someone, the love is not based on what the other person does or does not do.  Real love is not earned and not conditional.  Sure, you may decide never to speak to this person again (and wisely so).  You may never agree to have a relationship with them again, but it doesn’t mean all your love for them vanished.  It may not be the kind of love you had before because the relationship has been damaged beyond repair.  You can still love someone and not want to be with them, see them, talk to them, or ever have anything else to do with them again.  Love cannot be killed.  It can be wounded, it can be stifled, it can be rejected–but it cannot be completely destroyed.  Never feel bad or weird for still having residual feelings for someone who hurt you.  Don’t be embarrassed because you still wish good for that person who did not return your love or your loyalty.  Break-ups are hard and no one ever really recovers from the ending of a relationship.  You gave your heart and your love to someone without hesitation and with belief in that person’s love in return.  That person did not live up to your hopes, your expectations, or your loyalty.  You still love them on some level and that’s okay.  Pray for them and pray for yourself.  May your capacity to love never be diminished by those who misuse that love.

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