You must save what you can of your life; you mustn’t lose it all simply because you’ve lost a part (Henry James). It’s difficult to move past set-backs, tragedy, heartache, and other bad things that happen. There are experiences we go through that leave us missing a piece of ourselves or a huge section of our life. Placing our entire happiness or reason to live on one thing is dangerous. We cannot build our lives around a single person or any other factor. We can continue to live even in the face of betrayal, victimization, disaster, hardship, and suffering. It is not always fair (it hardly ever is fair) and whether we have a pleasant and just life is not necessarily based on anything we may have control over. We are led to believe if we “do right” then good things will happen and if we “do wrong” bad things will happen. When bad things happen a part of us wrongly believes we must have done something to deserve it. Other people (and society) reinforces this wrong belief. We blame people for what happens to them and we blame ourselves sometimes for what happens to us. There really are situations 100% beyond our control yet we suffer for them any way. Life truly is not fair, and there really is no universal law that guarantees “good” people will have good lives. Take what goodness you can from life and live through the bad times. Rise above the unfairness and hardship and enjoy what you can when you can. More importantly, don’t base your happiness on people, things, or circumstances beyond your control. Most of all, don’t dwell on the “why me” too much because doing so can sink you into a dark emotional hole very quickly. Focus on the good you have in your life regardless of how small that good may be. There is always something to be thankful for and something to enjoy. There is always hope. This, too, shall pass.