Avoiding a feeling, topic or situation that is inevitable only makes it worse to me.  I like to get things over with if there is a specific situation I know I have to face.  While facing things head on is not pleasant or comfortable it is not as bad as when I let things go on too long and then it’s really bad.  For example, when someone says or does something that bothers me I may let it go and not admit even to myself that I am bothered.  This could go on for years.  Eventually I do address it but since I let it go on so long then it ends up being a blow-up or I am completely overboard with it.  Feelings get hurt.  Bridges are burned.  I try not to let things go on too long like this but the very nature of avoidance is that sometimes (often) I don’t even realize I’m doing it–until it’s too late.  My problem is that I don’t ever want to think I don’t like a person or that something is a big deal to me.  It’s like I tell myself I’m not supposed to have negative feelings of any kind.  It never ends well when I deny my negative feelings.  Like I said, I’m working on it.  One thing that helps is to write (which I do).  Thanks for listening!

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